Hey hey we're the monkeys!
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Sunday, 04 October 09 - 07:20 PM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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So next week my probational 3 months are up at Disney and we have our first review... Am a little nervous about it, just since you never know, do you, and its always hard taking in criticism, no matter how positive, and I just am not that naive to think its all going to be praise for my awesomeness.
Honestly I think I have a feeling I know exactly what they are going to say: That I need to listen more, and not take it to heart when I get criticism. Hahaha...
Am worried about the fact that they are going to point out that I get worried about criticism. LOL.
But anyway, realising that I have already been at DIS for 3 months now also made me think about a few other things, like I have now been in the UK for over a year. I started to think about how worried I was at the time whether I had made the right choice.
A year ago I had a place in Malaysia, with friends and loved ones, and a career (of sorts). And I came back to England for a few reasons. A) to pursue the dream and do my MA... and B) to be closer to family in case they needed me, or...in case I needed them.
I also wanted to settle down. Find love, make my own family. Etc. This was kinda a big thing...having moved so often in the past few years.
So lets take stock now.
I am still single, so the family thing didnt work. Yet. I am still building on a good strong network of friends, my mates in Wales are still close by, but...I will get there.
But here are the things that truly matter.
I got an internship with Disney Interactive Studios before even finishing my MA.
My sister is pregnant, going to have a little girl in January and I CAN BE THERE FOR HER!
On weekends I can visit my cousin if I need advice, a bit of family madness...etc:)
I am happy.
I feel like I am really getting somewhere.
There are of course times when...I feel like I suck. I am a terrible gamer. Got kicked off a Left4Dead game today. I don't blame them, I probably would have ended up shooting all my teammates...and it was my first online game too...but am trying to remember that I have other nongaming talents...like filmmaking. I am not a gamer, I am an illustrator, designer and animator. It just wouldnt be fair if I was an awesome gamer too. Although I am pretty vicious at Tekken....
Other days I just feel like I am in so far over my head its not even funny. Like I am a kid trying to live in a grownup world. But then again, those days aren't as often anymore...and I have a feeling I will be having those days until...well until I have no more days...
There are still so many things I need to change about myself so that I can care about me a little more. I need to take care of myself a lot better than I have been doing lately. My weekends are usually quiet, I need them to rest and recuperate after the week...and this weekend has been good. A little downtime etc.
Ugh, this has to be the most aimless bloody blog I have ever written.
What am I trying to say here?
I feel like I am in the right place, at the right time for once. I feel like I am slowly (but steadily) getting where I want to be.
But, its a lot emptier here than I thought it would be, and...I feel like at any moment I could self destruct and sabotage myself off this path.
I have no idea where I will be at this time next year and it both terrifies and thrills me.
Don't get me wrong, I am NOT complaining....am just a little...unsure of myself. Bacon and chocolate are helping...but...that in turn causes other insecurities.
What do you guys do when you feel like you are a slightly retarded 5 year old with anger management issues, trying to cut it in an adults world?
August already?
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Tuesday, 04 August 09 - 10:00 PM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Date: August 4th, 2009
Location: Ealing, London
Weight: 9 st 3 lb
Current mood: BORED
Somehow we have already entered the gloriously transitional month of August. The month that serves as the buffer between summer and fall, the month that watches us cling with desperate hands to the little sunshine left on the horizon. I am being moody here aren't I.
Honestly, its just another month, but I am surprised it came so fast. Cannot believe I have already worked for Disney for 3 weeks...and I still fucking love it! The jobs vary from day to day, and the people are...oh they are human and very fucking interesting, and my lovely girlie Sofie, well she keeps me laughing day in and day out:) I have more fun at work than home and that has been especially true for the past 4 days I have spent BEDRIDDEN DUE TO FUCKING SWINEFLU! Yeah btw theres no swearbox here suckers! I can swear all I want!
Um yeah they kinda made me a swearbox at work...its a good idea...:) Other people there swear too, just...not as much as me perhaps. I think I take a little more joy in it than most. :D
So yeah last Thursday I had a sore throat, then on Friday a cough, then Friday night I was in bed by 9 with a horrible cold sweat and nightmares and ugh...over the past weekend I have...
- not eaten much at all, which is why I am now lighter...
- read one book (The Book of Lost Things, awesome)
- watched the entire first season of "Lie to Me", love Tim Roth...
- and the first 5 episodes of "True Blood" ( its so so hot)
- watched the Hangover too (good but reminded me way too much of someone lol...)
- and Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (Matthew McConaug-haaaay is hot, shut up)
- set up my Cintiq finally
- drunken loads of cough syrup
- eating buckets of paracetamol
- gone on Tamiflu (oh god the nausea)
oh god I am so so sick of my room. I missed work for 2 days and honestly honestly WTF. I would rather have been anywhere but sick with this flu. I would rather have been working in an old folks home changing old peoples soiled diapers. Yes. It was possibly the nastiest illness I have had in years. Oh god yes. IT WAS BAD. Am not even being a drama queen. I didnt almost die or anything but man... Ok so first there were the coughing spasms where I couldnt sleep, the weakness and the cold sweats, the sore throat, lungs, body etc... then I went on Tamiflu which caused nausea so on top of everything else, I felt like I was going to be sick all the time. And those of you who know me, know that I dont throw up often, and nausea? Yeah I am not too good with nausea.
But now its over. I feel oodles better. I still have a horrible lungclenching cough, but luckily now my body is strong enough to actually cope with it. And it sure as hell doesnt sound sexy, but hey I am alive... The rumbling in my lungs every time I breathe is annoying as hell, but am guessing that will pass as i cough all this crap out...
and back to work tmrw yay! I missed my crew. I mean of course I hope they did ok without me, but a teeny little part of me hopes that they did miss me! SOFIE YOU KNOW YOU MISSED ME!
Life back in Newport seems to be going along just fine without me, which is good. I dont have time for that, but part of me wishes I was needed sometimes lol... I miss my boys up there... Am heading to Belfast to see my Nina in a couple of weeks, cannot wait, my girl in the WIZARD OF OZ, am so dead excited!
Anyway, just wanted to say hi there, yes I am still alive. And until I have some more juicy updates (ummm yes there was this one weekend before last where i...cough cough....damn this cough!) I am going to bid you farewell!
Love you longtime!
x
First week at DIS
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Saturday, 18 July 09 - 10:48 PM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Weight: 9 st 7 lb
Current mood: A little maudlin
So now I have survived my first week at work in London! Oh it has been insane...and so wonderful. There are so many benefits to working for Disney that I had never imagined and jebus I just have to stop every now and then and remind myself to breathe...
I am getting used to London, found a couple of places I love, like Portobello Road, and actually I really do love my neighbourhood, it doesnt seem like London somehow. Oh and there are a few pubs on the waterfront not far from work that are just a little slice of heaven on earth. Food is versatile and plentiful, but fucking pricy. But yay sushi! and yay green curry! I only have had time to cook about twice this week...
Ok so lets talk work. They have us doing some concept artwork and sketches for a new game. The GForce game is coming out soon and we are testing that, and we are also testing a few other games that I dont think I should be talking about. Let me just say. I DRAW AND PLAY GAMES AND THINK UP CRAZY SHIT! God I love my job. I am actually getting paid for this.
Theres a cinema in the building, for screenings and sometimes celebrities use it. Like Madonna and Johnny Depp. Yes.
One of the other interns ran into Colin Firth in the lift last year. My boss had a meeting with TIM BURTON last week. Yes, yes he did. And yes I had to literally stop myself from attaching myself to my boss's leg and forcing him to drag me all the way to Burtons production house. My boss is damn cool btw, in fact all the creative team are damn cool...Seriously, its nuts sitting alongside some of the most talented people in the games industry and having them answer every little dumb question I ask. I wish I could say more but yeah...
There are jellybeans in the cafeteria. We have a teeny starbucks there too. Just for us. There are sample sales. There are discounts.
I work until 6 or 7 every day. Why? BECAUSE WHEN WORK IS DONE I DONT WANNA GO HOME! I would rather hang out there...lol.
Disney Interactive Studios is the most amazing place on earth to work.
The only downside is that in a years time the internship will be over, and there are no positions available for my job description in that office. But Disney is massive, like a huge octopus it has tentacles everywhere and I have been assured that if I work hard, I will get a good job, with the help of my bosses.
Oh oh oh! You know who Bob Iger is? CEO of Disney? yeah went to see him give a talk last week. Dude makes about 20 mill per year. Yeah.
For once I wish time would slow the fuck down. This is too awesome.
Why am I maudlin though? Well, am knackered, and need a break, but all my bestest friends, are...well, not here. I seriously need to get a cat. Or a chihuahua. Is it easy to train them?
PS. A little shout out to Sofieee, aka JoBroHo, my fellow production intern. She and I keep each other insane. She is awesssssoooooommme. Oh yeah I went there.
July 7th
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Friday, 17 July 09 - 12:34 AM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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In the interest of this being my first blogpost from London, I thought I would do it Bridget Jones style:)
Weight: 9 st, 6 lb (this just happens to be 7 pounds lighter than last week when I made the silly attempt to see how much I could beef up in one week. The answer was: a lot. I could easily pursue a career as a bodybuilder lol...)
Cigarettes smoked: Ummm well there was that one when I was saying goodbye to Nath and Jon, and the other while I was waiting for my train from Paddington to Ealing...so...2. But that was yesterday lol...
General mood: Ummm...unsure.
Woke up at around noon to find the flat as quiet as it was when I arrived last night, seems the people in here are rather solitary creatures on weekdays, which suits me just fine, since I start work next Monday:)
Spent the day so far cleaning the walls, and discovering that the paint rubs off along with the dirt....oops. Gonna pick up a pot of paint later I guess. I want to paint the whole room, but the ceilings are way high and I am teeny so, thats not going to work. Unless I make friends with a giant. I could do that I suppose.
I need various things for this room to feel like home, the first would be an INTERNET CONNECTION! Yeah I need one. Badly. Its freaking me out being disconnected. Which is probably why I am blogging. Am actually just typing this into my laptop in the hope that soon in the future I can upload it.Gah.
Other things I need are:
A mirror (so I can do my makeup and hair of course)
A desk for work
A chair to sit on while I do work
MY FRICKING IMAC. Yes its still in Cardiff being looked at. Ugh:( I miss Koalaku so much... I cannot believe he just exploded like that...hope they can salvage at least the harddrive...I dont wanna lose all my pictures! And music!
Paintings for the walls...or like something. Was thinking of picking up a blank canvas today and just painting some random shit:)
Day after tomorrow I am heading up to Lincoln with my sister and my nephew (yay! :)) for my cousins wedding. It will be the biggest family event I have been to in...like...4 years I think lol...Am really looking forward to it!
Then over the weekend I will be entertaining my younger cousin Thomas, we are going to check out Madam Tussauds, the London eye, etc, never seen any of that so it should be a blast:)
And yeah then on Monday I start work. Where? AT DISNEY interactive Studios in Hammersmith. What was that? Oh yes I said it. DISNEY! Lol, it doesn't get old. And when it does, well, hit me.
Right I am going to get myself dressed and head out to explore my hood! Talk to you soon my homies:)
x
July 9th
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Friday, 17 July 09 - 12:34 AM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Day 3 in London!
Weight: 9 st 5 lb
Cigarettes smoked: One yesterday and about 3 the day before...
General mood: Heartbroken and lonely and so looking forward to being surrounded by family for the next two days...
Well everything's off with whatshisface, we had decided to give it a go, gave it a go and its all gone now. In a way I guess its for the best, its only fair to give the London boys a chance, and maybe now I can see what its like to date an older man lol... I wonder, will I be able to give up the beefcake?
Honestly though although I am putting on a brave face, I am gutted. I hate how easily I fall for people. I could probably fall for a tree if it smiled at me and gave me a cocky line lol...
There are a gazillion and reasons and one why I am better off now, but...ah for fucks sake my heart won't listen.
My room is looking fairly decent now, it just needs 3 things to make it home, my computer, desk and chair lol...
Internet is being set up next week so soon all this will be online woop, then I can probably stop blogging for a while and just update my facebook status every few minutes as usual...
I met another one of my flatmates, Ramona from Romania and she is awesome. She is the kind of person that makes a house a home and I really am so happy shes here. My first new friend in London:)
I want a cat. Am seriously wondering if I could get away with having one in here quietly lol...would have to take it for walks every day after work lol...its doable!
Anyhoo, gotta head off and pick my sister up at Kings Cross! Yaaaaay! Cant wait to see her! Although I have to confess, am jealous as hell right now, shes in love and pregnant...hehe...
One day, right?
Disney, Life, Love and other stuff:D
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Friday, 26 June 09 - 12:34 PM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Lets set the stage.
Its Friday at noon...there's a light drizzle of rain outside and it suits my mood perfectly. Am feeling slightly melancholy, and we all know that is the optimal mood for blogging. Got a little bit of nostalgia and wistfulness going on that is completed by the strains of Michael Jackson's "Leave Me Alone" in the background. How many times I have danced my booty off to his tracks...and I am sure I will for many years to come.
Next week is the big move to London. The contracts from Disney arrived in April and were sent back in May after a thorough reading through all the confidentiality clauses and legalities. Its so real.
I found somewhere to live in a flat with 3 other girls my age, its 5 stops away from Hammersmith on the tube, and in a nice place, its also close to my cousin's flat, which helps:), main thing is, its affordable clean and nice!
Work starts on the 13th of July, and I have to say I can't wait. I found out I will be working with a chick from Ireland, who has travelled around a bit like I have. Her artwork is pretty kickass too, you can see it HERE. The two of us will be the production interns for Disney Interactive Studios, the games division. We get to come up with ideas for games, test the ones in production and just do what we are best at, being silly.
There are tons of other interns at Disney every year, but the rest are all stuck in Marketing or Accounting. Me and Sofie have the dream job.
My plan is to work my ass off, staying late, doing weekends, going the extra mile (and another 5) in the hope that once the year is up, they will want to hire me fulltime... Oh god that would be awesome! Then maybe one day....Pixar!
I just never thought that I would be working for Disney before I finish studying... I thought I had set my sights high with wanting to work for Aardman...but Disney I always thought was out of my league! My dreams are coming true:) and damn it feels good. It feels so unbelievably amazing to get the affirmation that yes I am on the right track, ya know?
I was astounded I even got the interview at the time...
Basically this is what happened:
I sent in the creative brief HERE in February and in April I got this amazing email from the current production intern, David Holland, asking me to come in for an interview. I was jumping up and down in joy, just ask my Ma, she got the full brunt of my freakout lol...
I was ecstatic. Then as I was finishing up my semester I pushed aside thoughts of Disney, I was busy settling into life here. I was happy, I had some amazing friends, and somehow it didn't seem like it could happen. I didn't think it would be possible.
Then I went for the interview. OMG i was panicking my ass off. Stepped into the lobby, and was waiting next to this massive jewel encrusted Mickey Mouse statue...and a chair made out of Pluto stuffed toys. Not intimidating at all...HA!
And all these people kept walking past with portfolios and briefcases and all looking very important and...vibrant somehow...that was the weird thing, noone seemed tired or pissed off.
But I was bloody terrified, had no idea what to expect. And as I sat there quietly shitting myself, I realised the lunacy of the moment. There I was, not even done with my MA, in the lobby of Disney Interactive Studios in London, waiting for an interview. My brain could not handle it. So I decided it had to be a dream. I decided fuck this, its too bizarre and farfetched to be REAL. And so I went through the interview with a smile on my face handling questions with ease and determination and...yeah I didnt know how it went really, but I knew I had been honest and given them a good idea of who I was and what I could do for them.
Then I went home, and was completely and utterly knackered. Morning after I had a phonecall.
I got the job.
And instead of being ecstatic like when I got the interview, I got a horrible sinking sensation in my stomach, because I knew I would have to move again, I would have to say goodbye to all my friends here and leave.
And I was terrified I would have another depression attack like I did in January, only this time I would not have my support group. Most of all I knew I would lose my best friend at the time. Things had been going well with him, and we were getting closer and closer...but I knew that if I left, it would stop.
And it did. That was the sacrifice I had to make for Disney. I knew it at the time.
But I also knew I had to take the job.
Now, I am feeling good about it. I made the right choice, like my cousin said, What's for you will not pass you by.
I have her in London, I have a few other old friends, and hell, I am sure it won't be that hard to make some new ones. My career is starting for real here and thank god. :D
Finally, had an amazing semester in uni, got B's all around:D and yeah our group project turned out really well, we have sent it off to a few festivals:D Its on my facebook page, but yeah I haven't uploaded the final cut to youtube yet....
Lovelife has thrown me a curveball, got me another boyfriend, its not serious yet, and I don't know if it will survive the long distance, but its good for me this one is, he really cares about me and isnt afraid to show it.
My sister is coming to visit and shes going to have her second child soon, theres a big family wedding coming up, so many things are happening, all life-affirming and joyous.
There is so much to look forward to, but instead of living in the future as I normally do, I am just trying to live in the present and enjoy my last few days in Newport. God I love this place. Its dodgy as fuck, but its been home:) And my friends here have been amazing, I am definitely keeping in touch with them all.
So London baby, here we come:)
P.S. here are a couple of pictures I have been working on, just to keep you going!
Seems I only write when somethings WRONG, or right. Or conflicted.!
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Wednesday, 13 May 09 - 12:27 AM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Well here I am again, yes it HAS been ages, did you miss me?
So why am I back here after all this time? Yep you guessed it, am feeling all emo again.
Let me begin by saying here and let me make this very clear:
I LOVE MY PROBLEMS. I mean I do have the best dilemmas in the world, and my troubles are nowhere near those of the starving children in Africa, but they are mine, and right now they are completely overwhelming which kinda says a lot about how self-absorbed I am...
Anyway yeah so what have I been up to over the past couple of months?
I went to counselling, which in a way made it unnecessary for me to blog, since blogging has always been a sort of therapy for me.
Counselling was good, and it was just incredible to have someone there for me week after week, listening to me talk about how life is, and how things are and what I want...
It was just so so good to have someone there for me. No strings attached.
It got me through the horrendous breakup I was going through and it also has helped me detach a little from the thing thats going on now.
But oh well. Its fucked now. Literally.
And the main reason it has no future? I am leaving.
After all the whining I have done about moving and how I want stability, how could I possibly be moving again you might ask?
Well I got offered the dream job.
A year long internship with DISNEY Interactive Studios in London, sketching up game concepts:D
YES ITS AWESOME I KNOW AND I AM SOOOOO HAPPY ABOUT IT!
Careerwise.
Emotionally? Its a fucking nightmare.
I have just managed to get myself settled into life here, made some awesome friends and was just feeling good about myself. And now I have to get up and move AGAIN to London.
And in a years time I will be moving again.
I mean at least this time its not moving country, but still I can totally foresee myself moving to San Fran to work for Pixar in the future. (If I can get an internship with DIsney, I can totally work for Pixar one day).
But yeah do you see my inner conflict?
I will never ever turn the Disney job down coz it is what I have wanted my whole life (careerwise).
On the other hand, I am going to miss all my friends over here so goddamn much:(
I was just starting to settle into life here. Felt like I had a home, was building up a rhythm...and now? I have to go do it aaall again in the Londons.
London feels like the real world. Am scared shitless I wont be able to cut it, and I am scared shitless I will end up feeling alone and isolated like I did in January. I dont ever wanna feel like that again:/
I want to get myself into a good place so I can head to London with pride and confidence and kick ass.
But instead I feel like I am about 2 feet tall and armed with a stick of floppy celery.
FUCKING HELL I HATE MY DEPRESSIONS!
I want prozac.
Just wondering, at what point can I settle down and just...love.
Animated Exeter and life:)
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Tuesday, 17 February 09 - 11:53 AM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Its amazing how a little bit of sunshine can cheer a person up. My weekend in Exeter turned out to be one of the best things I could have done for myself. And to think, I wasn’t even going to go!
The week before had its shares of ups and downs, some major downs and some pretty major ups and damn there were some mad moments in between, but I have to say, all in all I feel so much more optimistic. The counseling session really helped.
I have let go of the past, yeah sure it still hurts, but theres nothing I can do about it now, and I feel so much better now that its all over.
Saturday morning I boarded the train to Exeter and armed with my backpack and an overpriced breakfast roll and coffee I spent the ride typing up my script for my final project.
I arrived on time and with the first draft done, and walked the 5 minutes to my bed and breakfast, the Telstar, where I checked in easily and quickly.
10 minutes later I was sat in my room comfortably revising the script, getting myself ready for the Alan Gilbey scriptwriting class.
After having a quick walk around Exeter city center I discovered a chip shop and stuffed my face with some damn awesome chips, while waiting for the class to start at the Exeter Phoenix.
My first impression of Mr Gilbey was rather funny. He was standing and talking to the television screen…or rather to the animated dinosaur onscreen.
He was basically pulling a Windsor McKay. McKay is credited for creating the first real animated character. Things had been animated before, but never had a character had such depth and personality.
Nice start to the scriptwriting class, I would say, although I thought he was a bit loony.
Then he tells us, this is not a sit down and listen workshop, this is an ACTIVE workshop and mentally I groaned.
I am kinda shy when it comes to strangers and…to be honest, jumping around doing exercises for 3 hours was not my idea of a good Saturday. But then again, beats the crap out of sitting for 3 hours… I probably would have fallen asleep!
Then the exercises started and I swear to god, for the next 3 hours I learned SO MUCH. Yes the exercises were a bit silly, but they did exactly what they were supposed to: They loosened us all up and got us thinking!
I enjoyed the day so much!
I got so many new ideas and insights into character development and scriptwriting that I could barely type fast enough.
And then after the class Gilbey and I sat down in the café and discussed what’s going on with animation today and damn, he was just so nice!
In fact everyone at the workshop was damn nice, I swapped a few business cards with people and of course Mr Gilbey and then on my way out I discovered that one of my classmates that day is the creator of StopMotion Pro, which is one of the biggest stopmotion animation softwares on the market. The dude is Australian and I swear I thought he was an animator. In no way did he fit my idea of a programmer or software developer, but that’s exactly what he does.
Unfortunately they don’t do Mac software, but regardless I got his card, and gave him mine and damn what amazing contacts right there!!!
I was blown away after the first day and already so so glad I had come.
That evening I sat in my b&b room and just chilled, thinking about all the things I had learned and trying to make some sense of it all.
Pretty good Valentines Day to be honest!
This morning I woke up freakishly early and had an amazing free English Breakfast before heading off to Exeter and shot some pics of graveyards and stuff for reference.
I also ended up in a shoeshop (Office)…somehow…and due to the most amazingly friendly customer service, I bought some awesome boots…mmm they are pretty. And then when I was paying for them the other shopgirl spotted my camera and we had a bit of a chat about that, turns out shes into fashion photography so I said come to Newport etc…
So it was already an awesome day. Then I showed up at the life drawing class for animators, hosted by an Aardman person, and DAMN. Our model was a dancer!!!!
We had this girl dancing in front of us for 2 hours holding the most beautiful poses while we frantically sketched our arms off…
I hadn’t taken a life drawing class in about..8 years and it felt awesome… I could feel everything I had learned coming back to me.
I really enjoyed that.
After the class the dancer came up to see my drawings and I promised her some copies of course, good thing I had brought my camera, it gave me a chance to photograph all my drawings before they got smudged from being rolled up and carried back to Newport. Yes people, I was using CHARCOAL! ME! Lol…
Finally there was a comic book expo next door. I was in heaven. I bought 3 comics and I cannot wait to get home and read them and study the artwork. Yeah no I don’t collect comics…I read them and look at the artwork ☺
Slightly less geeky I suppose. I am wearing a Star Wars tshirt today though. And Batgirl undies. Oh well…
Am on my way home now, on the train with a smile on my face and a twinkle in my eye.
Life is good, no its great. Thank god I let go.
Bring on the PAIN!
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Saturday, 31 January 09 - 05:43 PM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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Hey yall, from now on this blog will be purely for my rants and ramblings and more personal updates but for the work related stuff you can go to the new website as advertised above and below!
Enjoy:D
Wahay!
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Monday, 12 January 09 - 12:30 AM (GMT) By Helenasia - in Updates |
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At some point I wanna blog about 2008 and what it did for me and to me.
But uhm I am kinda busy right now. Too busy to deal with the angst that is brewing and too busy to clean up the mess in my brain. That will most likely come bite me in the ass soon. Just as long as I can keep the demons at bay until I finish my assignments and hand them in. Deadline is January 19th for 3 production bibles (each including storyboards, character designs, layouts, color palettes, scripts, budgets, moodboards, production schedules...fuck me sideways...), 2 animations, and 1 essay.
Can I do it? Yes I can.
Probably not the healthiest thing to do, this here denial of emotions etc, but to hell with it, the work has to be done and I am not going to sacrifice my future to be an emo child lol...
As you can see I am still laughing...there might be a hint of insanity in there, but hey lets find out what exactly I can achieve within this time frame. And then next time I am not going to do this again. Next time I am going to plan like I normally do.
Here's a small taste of whats coming though...
Oh and yeah I got a haircut again...and discovered its short enough to do a fawxhawk. So I did...lol:D
Nifty innit?
Disclaimer: If you just read a whole ton of stuff you didn't wanna read and you wish you could just bypass the ramblings and see my latest work and inspiration, now you can! Visit The Ultimate Creations of Helenasia and all your dreams can come true!... More items are available in my News Archive
